How Self Awareness Can Make You Irresistible to Your Personal Success
We all want to become successful, we all want to live a happy life but we are unable to do so… Why?
How can we become successful both in professional life (either its business, job, politics or armed services etc.) and personal life (either relationships :single, married, parenting or your personal goals)?
We have dreams which we wish could achieve but we don’t bother to pursue them because we know they are impossible to achieve as they require lot of hard work and getting in lot of trouble….
But still we need a successful life, we still need our life of dreams but how?
The first question above was ‘Why’, why we are unable to achieve successful life and the second question was ‘How’ we can become successful even if we know our dreams(what we want to be)but still we don’t pursue.
The answer to both of these questions is ‘self-awareness’. If you want to know how you can become irresistible to your personal success and growth then you should be aware of your inner self, the more you get aware of your ‘self’, the moreyou can awake your inner giant and the more you can get motivated to achieve success.
In this post I will discuss: What is Self Awareness, what it has to do with your personal development and success, how you can achieve success in your lives by increasing your self-awareness and then practicing it.
I bet you if you read it till end you will be opening up your doors of subconscious mind, you will discover your inner world, what kind of messes exists inside you that stops you from moving forward and upward in your life. Ultimately holding you back to achieve your life of dream and success.
You will also discover the enormous powers you have inside you in the form of will- power, courage, consistency, patience, empathy, focus, self motivation and self belief that make you fly high.
I have divided the post in 6 components so you can easily browse the post.
- Self Awareness Definitions
- Self Awareness Example
- 3 Key Ways To Get Self Awareness
- 7 Best Practices To Increase Self Awareness
- Benefits of Self Awareness Lead Towards Personal Growth and Success.
Self Awareness Definitions
I have gathered some of the best definitions available which defines self-awareness to give you a clear view of what the term means…
Merriam Webster /Wikipedia:
“an awareness of one’s own personality or individuality”
Collins Dictionary :
“the quality of being conscious of one’s own feelings, character.”
Google Dictionary :
“Conscious knowledge of one’s own character, feelings, motives, and desires.”
“Self-awareness involves monitoring our stress, thoughts, emotions, and beliefs.”
“Self-awareness is the ability to see yourself clearly and objectively through reflection and introspection.”
Self-awareness is the ability to focus on yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions do or don’t align with your internal standards. If you’re highly self-aware, you can objectively evaluate yourself, manage your emotions, align your behavior with your values, and understand correctly how others perceive you.
In simpler words,
Self-awareness is a one’s ability to objectively recognize and analyze one’s own thoughts, emotions and feelings and take corrective measures accordingly.
Self Awareness Meaning and Example
Now I will try to explain self awareness with very simple example so you can get the concept easily.
Why You look at mirror daily…? Obviously To see your self… Right.?
Is it necessary to see your self daily in the mirror? Yes… Because of many reasons you have….
The underlying reasons for all reasons is to look at yourself and adjust your physical appearance to look good and beautiful.
Now there is another mirror which helps you to look inside your self to monitor what is in your heart, mind and soul that control your thoughts, feelings and emotions, which are linked with the invisible (your dreams, aspirations and needs) and are expressed in the visible (your actions, behaviors, habits, relationships and environment).
This internal mirror is the mirror of Self- Awareness. Now you can understand how important is this mirror, the more clearer you are able to see it the more you get to know about your self and the more beautiful you can make your self from within which will effect both invisible and visible and make your life beautiful and successful.
A Simple But Very Powerful Exercise Of Self-Awareness:
This is a very interesting exercise if you make it your habit this will build your inner self beautiful and solve your life big problems.
The More Beautiful You Make Your Inner Self by looking at your Inner Mirror , The More Beautiful Your Life Becomes and The More Success You Embrace
No matter which area of your inner self you are suffering and you want to make it beautiful with your inner mirror…
For instance, if you are struggling with happiness and you are often engulfed with grief or guilty or any other thing that stops you from becoming happy for example
‘having cash shortage in your pockets all the time keeps you in depression ’.
Here you can do this powerful exercise to figure out your this problem.
Now the first step of exercise is to Find Your Problem, in our above case its:;
- Lack of Money
The second step is to Get Knowledge about your problem. Find out ‘what’, ‘why’, ‘how’ and ‘when’ about your problem.
A proven way to do this through reading relevant literature and if you don’t like reading, do it more easier way watch relevant videos on YouTube.
Find out about your problem, in our example it’s ‘Greif and pain of having less money’ . Find out, how to have more money, view the stories of people who have gone through the same problem and then successfully resolve it.
The third step is Transformation that is to use this knowledge and analyze your situation where you stand now and where you want to go. Using the knowledge which you gain through the exercise you can set your goals and plan out to solve your problem.
The output of this exercise is, you will be able to wipe off your inner mirror dust and see your inner condition, where the problem exist, what are its symptoms and what are the possible solutions and how you can make adjustments and improvements to solve your this problem.
This whole three step process is a simple and excellent exercise of self awareness.
You can use this inner body building exercise to build your inner muscles when ever you like and for what ever inner problems your have that govern your emotions, thoughts and motivations.
I personally use this exercise ands it has now become my continuous habit.
3 Key Questions To Get Self-Awareness
In the next section you will learn how you can practice self awareness and how you can increase it.
In order to start your self awareness journey and to know about true inner self so that you can change your life, you must to start with the following 3 simple and key questions….
· Who Am I?
· What is My Current State and Why?
· Where I Want To Go?
Who Am I?
When you ask your self this question it opens the subconscious doors of your mind that drive more similar questions like this, for instance : what is my life purpose? Why I am created? What is my identity? What is my role in the society?
All these thoughts take you deep inside in your soul to search who the hell you really are….. By asking this question from your self ‘Who Am I’ again and again you start your journey to self awareness, you start to look inside your self and try to find your identity, you get deeper in your thoughts and you come to know you have a soul, a heart and a mind.
Then you again ask the same question you come to know that two different and extremely opposite kind of persons dwell inside your soul one is evil and the other is pious and they are in continuous battle with each other and the one who is stronger dominates your heart and mind and appears in your personality.
There is a story of two wolves, grandfather and grandson.
Grandfather tells to his grandson about his inner life feelings:
Grandfather: “I always feel two wolves inside me, One Good(filled with empathy, care, love, patience, kindness, mercy, selflessness) other the opposite (filled with pride, arrogance, envy, ego, anger, hate, enmity, selfishness)……..
I always find them continuously
Fighting each other..”
Grandson asks innocently,“Whowins”..
Grandfather answer with an excellent reply, “The One You Feed”.
Self Awareness Give You Insights of Your Invisibles
As you dig deep in your self by asking ‘Who Am I’, your self awareness journey will help you see your invisibles: These invisible are as follows:
- VALUES: Values are your internal standards of life. Your values may differs from others. For instance you have your own standard of love, empathy, happiness and others may have different. Self-awareness helps you in developing and improving your values.
For example : punctuality may not be of great value to you in the beginning but as you become more self aware you may make punctuality a value for your success.
BELIEFS: Beliefs are your perspectives about your self and the world.A strong beliefin your self makes you a strongpersonality by developing success characteristics in your self like positive mindset, willpower, self confidence,perseverance, resilience etc.
Self Awareness helps you in developing a strong belief in your self which makes your personality the extraordinary and helps you change your life by changingyour thought.
For me,self-awareness have helped me in believing in God The Al-Mighty, by thinking how Great And Merciful is HE, who have given me enormous internal powers to accomplish whatever I dream.
- DREAMS: The dreams are your vision of your life, the big picture of yourself, the one you want to be in future. The dreams drive you to live life by your own terms and to follow your passion.
The more you get self-aware, the more you are in position to pursue your dreams successfully. This is because, Self-awareness make you aware of your strengths, abilities and capabilities and how to take maximum output from them to achieve your dream goal.
Conversely self-awareness also let you learn about your weaknesses, lags, negative emotions,, demotivations and how to minimize their impacts on your success.
For instance you may have a dream to become a billionaire entrepreneur but you not try to pursue your dream because you think it’s impossible to achieve , this is because you are not self-aware.
You can find outmore about your dreams and learn how to achieve them.
- NEEDS: According to Maslow, all humans have 5 basic kinds of needs which drive their motivations.
These five needs are
- Physiological needs(food, shelter, sleep, air, water etc);
- Safety needs(security, health, employment, community etc);
- Emotional needs(love, affection, care, empathy, relationships etc);
- Self esteem (self respect, dignity, status, recognition etc);
- Self actualization needs( dream, self – fulfilment, desire of becoming something, personal development ).
Self Awareness helps you recognize your needs and their positive and negative affects on your life. It helps to minimize the negative impact on your life when your needs are not fulfilled and reinforce positivity and motivation in your behaviour to overcome your need related challenges.
- EMOTIONS: One of the main benefit of Self awareness is that it helps you get aware of your emotions like things that make you happy, excited, sad, angry, jealous, love, hate etc.
Moreover, It helps you identify your impulses, your triggers, and most importantly how to control them. This process of getting aware of your emotions and their effective management is known as emotional intelligence. According to Daniel Goleman,self-awareness is it is at the core of emotional intelligence and is a component of emotional intelligence.
STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES: Knowing your strengths and weaknesses and learning how to take benefits from both of these is key to personal success and growth. With the help of self-awareness , you dig out what are you good at, what are your qualities and abilities, for instance you are either hard working, punctual, creative , excellent communicator etc.
Moreover self-awareness helps you out in gaining more strengths by learning news skills and furtherpolishing your core strengths and inherent abilities.
On the other hand it also helps you to identify your weaknesses, where you lag behind e.g. yourprocrastination, impulsiveness , rigidness in attitude etc. And how to minimize your weaknesses by working upon them.
Thus, With your own Self awareness, you can benefit from your strength and weaknesses by optimizing both and also you can convert your weaknesses into strengths.
What is My Current Status and Why?
Next important question to ask from yourself in this self awareness journey is,
“What is my current status and why?”
You may wonder here, everyone knows his/her current status and also about why? so what is so fancy about it to put this question here…?
a farmer knows he is a farmer and he is living a life similar to all other farmers,
A medical specialist working in a hospital knows her current status and also know her why?
Likewise everyone knows about his/her status and it’s why… So what’s so special about it…
Yes you are right that everyone knows his/her current status either its professional, personal or social but….
Here the context of the question is changed...
Here we are talking about getting self-awareness and in this context we first ask ‘Who Am I ’ after knowing the answer next comes this question ‘what is my current status and why’.
Here it means,Am I satisfied with my current status, if not, then why? By knowing the answer of ‘Who Am I’ we learn about are invisibles(discussed above). These invisibles tell us about our values, needs, beliefs and vision of our life. Then we can analyze either we are living our life according internal standards or not.
Next asking yourself here, ‘what is my current status and why’, the purposehere is to stop pointing towards others for failuresand dissatisfied status like blaming your parents, relatives, peers, system, God, and environment, which you do point, if you don’t have self awareness and you don’t have asked your self the first question.
By questioning about ‘Why of your currentstatus’ from your self, you start looking inwards… For instance I am living a mediocre life because I don’t aim towards living a high end life, or if I had a dream to live high end life, I actually don’t try to pursue it seriously because it requires a lot of hard work and getting my self in troubles and that I don’t want to do….
In above example asking second question of self awareness helps you figure out the symptoms of your current status and your ‘Real Why’ that is related to you only.
In this manner you can find outways to change your life and current status to a desirable status.
It finally lead to next important questionwhich you start asking your self that is, what you want to do in life and what is your dream or what you want to be.
What I WantTo Be?
Asking this question after the above two questions, help you easily figure out, ‘what you want to be’.
This question is not only about your dream of becoming something, you can expand it in broader terms, from personal goals to social goals like..
What kind of spouse/partner I should be from what I am now?
What kind of student I should be from what I am now?
What kind of parent I should be from what I am now ?
What kind of behavior I should have in my house with my family or at my workplace with my peers or as a boss from what I have been behaving ?
Getting self-awareness of your invisibles can help change your visibleswhich are your actions, behaviors, expressions, habits, relationshipsetc that can lead towards your professional success and social happiness.
Thus, Self Awareness helps you in figuring out your blind spots, by working on them you can become a better person and live life high personal success and growth.
Summing it up, first question let you know about your self, your invisibles which let you understandthe second question that is related to your current status and its why and finally the third question give you the direction of how you can change to become what you want to be.
7 BEST PRACTICES TO INCREASE
YOUR SELF AWARENESS
Now coming to the point, how can you increase your self-awareness, how you can become a better person by becoming more self conscious. To solve your this problem I have researched the best practices and list outThe 7 best practices used by the Self-awarenessGurus, experts and practionistthat will not only make your more self aware but also to increase your self awareness, emotional intelligence, self consciousness and self control.
These are as follows:
I. Self Questioning
III. Practicing Mindfulness and Meditation
IV. Getting Knowledge
V. Taking help from Personal Development Coach
VI. External Feedback
VII. Self Awareness Tests
I. Self Questioning
It is my favorite technique to do self-awareness, it’s a God Gifted thing to every human.Anyone who is sane and mentally sound can apply instantly and take benefit of it.
I already have discussed thistechnique in the form of three key questions in above section so I will not repeat it again here. You can add more questions to it to.
For instance to work on your weaknesses like why do I often burnout? What I can do to neutralize the scene when again a burnout situation arise.
Writing is one of the best practice of increasingyourr self awareness. Most of the top personalities like, Tony Robbins, Brian Tracy, Jack Canfield, Tim Ferris, Marie Forleo to name a few, use it frequently to improve their self awareness and achieve their goals.
All you have to do is write your all problems on a plain page or excel sheet or maintain a diary, make a category of each problem ranging from professional to personal to social. You can also write your future goals and ambitions.
Writing all these problems will help you see all the invisibles and help you analyse the visible outcomes and ultimately take corrective actions accordingly.
For instance, you can write down even small events to get Self aware, last time you yell on your spouse on a minor thing, what were the conditions, what was the outcome, how it affected your spouse, your children and your day at work..
By doing so you will get insights of your invisibles or blind spots like your thoughts and emotions and your actions, and behaviours (visibles).
Now you can focus on what should be the ideal situation( win-win for all) and what kind of best efforts you could do to create a win-win situation next time.
Write your findings, you may find out, you have work load in office due to which you didn’t go fresh at your home, so you fought in your home with your spouse and created a mess at home, it also affected your children and home environment.
When you startwritingoccurings like this, you will start gettingdeeper insights of your self, you will see where you can make improvements, where you played wrong, what you can avoid and much more. Next time whenyouencounter such situations you can coupe up with them very intelligently which will make a very good impression on others ultimatelyleading towards a changed and improved life.
Like wise you can use writings to achieve your big dreams and goals and make a plan to achieve them and monitor your performance through writing.
III. Practicing Mindfulness and Meditation
Practicing mindfulness and meditation is a great way to increase your self-awareness. This technique is used world wide in different ways and methods and is also part of some religions.
Meditation is a basically thought process, practiced in an isolated environment often with eyes closed, done to achieve a particular objective or to solve a particular problem related to invisible and visible human characteristics.
Meditation can be done to achieve different objectives and to solve your different personal problems that your personally face in day to day life.
Meditation routine can help you increase your self-awareness but you have to make it a routine.
Mindfulness is also a type of meditation: You can practice mindfulness while your outside in public environment or in an isolated place. The purpose of mindfulness is to notice your thoughts without being judgemental and to be present with your thoughts where ever you are.
Mindfulness is paying attention to your thoughts, emotions and feelings appearing in your mind in a non judgmental way, such that you just focus on noticing your thoughts in an observing manner like an observer.Here you don’t get emotional or wander with your thoughts.
The purpose of mindfulness is to observe your mind as a third person and get aware of your thoughts and read them.
Mindfulness provides your awareness about your thoughts, emotions and feelings, how and when they occur and how you can control them.
Mindfulness have many benefits especially helps you out in achieving focus and concentration.
A good way to practice mindfulness is to pay not just attention but kind attention to all of the above things.
IV. Getting Knowledge
As you are reading this article, this is another way to get Self-Awareness. It is to learn self-awareness for self-awareness. Getting knowledge about your personal development is your sign of becoming the extraordinary and shows your high ambitions towards your life.
Getting knowledge of self-awareness helps you to know about the process of self-awareness, self control and self consciousness , how it works and how you can benefit from this process.
V. Getting Assistance From Personal Development Coach
Personal Development Coach are the gurus and masters in the field who teach and assist in getting personal development. You can find out the one who especially deal with self-awareness. For example Tony Robbins, Tim Ferris, Tasha Eurich, Daniel Goleman, Brian Tracy, Darren Hardy, Robin Sharma, VishenLakhianiand my favorite of all, Jim Rohn(2009 late). His life changing video have made remarkable changes in my life and due to which I startedTheDreamBlogger.
Hiring a coach can be too much expensive if you are an ordinary person but if you are a senior executive its a worth investment to make for your personal growth and success and for the success of your organisation.
If you are an ordinary person like me, you can take benefits from the free knowledge provided by the personal development Gurus as mentioned above at their blogs or YouTube videos, which are enough to make you self aware.
VI. External Feedback
Feedback is others view about you, it may be your parents, spouse, kids, colleagues, boss, mentor etc. A better way is to ask them about your good and bad habits or good or bad behaviours. But to digest this you have to make your heart big.
External Feedback is defined as External Self-Awareness by Tasha Eurich. According to her studies from 10 different investigations based on 5000 participants, her findings were as follows:
- Self-awareness is of two types one is internal self-awareness(which you do on your own) and the other is external self-awareness(which you get from others feedback about your personalityand behaviour) .
- The leaders and executives who were more successful and self aware, were having both kind of self-awareness external and internal.
Limitations of external feedback: it can not 100% unbiased or 100% perfect about you….As your office feedback can be totally different from your home feedback or your friends feedback can be different from relatives feedback…
At the end you have to make your own judgement by combining your personal or internal self-awareness and external feedback to make your self a better person.
Moreover you can take inputs from both kind of self-awareness according to the circumstances or situations you face.
To be aware of a single shortcoming within oneself is more useful than to be aware of a thousand in somebody else.”
– Dalai Lama
VII. Self-Awareness Test
These are also helpful way to increase your self but they don’t provide a detailed solution to the problems as other methods do that I have discussed above. But still they can give you a glimpse at your current self-awareness state, you may find different results from different test and then you can combine the results to make your own opinion and judgment as you know your self more than others do.
Here are some of the best tests regarding self awareness:
- INLP test: Judge your self-awareness on 10 main factors.
- Tasha Eurich Test: This test helps you out on external feedback and your own self-awareness.
- EQ Test: A very thorough test of your understanding of your self especially emotions, how they affect your life and goals.
- Mindtools: It’s a blog and website built with tools to enhance your professional and personal skills by increasing your self-awareness, self regulation and self evaluation.
In addition to the above tests you can also take personality tests which can further give you more insights about your personality.
TECHNIQUES TAKEAWAY: You can use a combination of these strategies to develop your self-awareness and apply them accordingly matching to your needs and circumstances. If you want to choose the best out of them, I recommend to go with any of the three : self questioning, writing and meditation and make it your permanent habit. I personally use a mix of above.
Here I have Free Gift For You .Its a SELF AWARENESS CHEAT SHEET which will help you to know your strength and weakness ,your good and bad habits and how your family, friends and working colleagues see you .These inputs will help you in increasing your self awareness and how you can improve and make your self better at work
This Self-Awareness Cheat Sheet
Will Help You Make Your Work
& Home life Successful
Benefits Self Awareness Leading Towards Personal Growth and Success
Uptill now, you have understand what is self awareness, why it’s important, how it can benefit and change your whole life by helping you in your personal and professional life thereby providing you a new way of living in a successful manner.
Also you may have got the point why it’s so essential to be self aware to achieve your dream and goals.
Moreover I have also told you best techniques to increase your self awareness.
Now I will discuss self-awareness benefitsyou can get by applying the above knowledge into your lives that will make you irresistible to personalsuccess and growth.
Here are some of the key benefits of self-awareness that lead to success as follows:
- Self Awareness helps to look you inwards to point out faults and flaws in your own self that are holding you back from attaining success rather than blaming others and out side environment.
According to Jim Rohn, “I had a huge list of external factors which were hindering me from success but later my mentor(Earl Shoaff) showed me the truth that it was me,myself, which was the main hindrance in my success and that was not all the way in my factors list and when I came to know about it changed my life.“
- Self awareness leads to self evaluation due to which you can handle your disruptive thoughts feelings and emotions that obstacles in your way to success and positivity.
- External Self awareness lead to your career and personal success, by letting you understand, how others see you, what they expect and how to present yourself to others in a better way in order to build healthyand strongrelationships.
- Self-awareness makes you great leader, studies have proven that great and successful leaders have both external and internal self-awareness..
- Self-awareness helps you take maximum benefit from your strengths and how to minimize the affect of your weaknesses for instance (negative emotions like anger, envy, arrogance).
- Self-awareness help you live a happy life by making you aware of your negativety and how to reverse it into positivity that leads to happiness.
With an awareness of your self, your strengths and weaknesses, your abilities and limitations and a vision of the personality you want to become, you can create a plan for your personal and professional growth and success.
Now you have understand why we are unable to lead a successful life even if we intent to live so? The real thing holding us back is our anonymity to ourselves which can be resolved through self-awareness the more we have it the more we can can create and live a successful life.
I have also showed you ways how you can increase your self-awareness, especially the seven best practices of self-awareness will help you out in this respect.
Lastly how increasing your self awareness can make you irresistible to your personal growth and success and help you resolving your personal life issues to lead you towards a successful life.
I would like to know whether this article help you in Awakening your inner self and if yes then how, please share your valuable comments below so to make it useful discussion.
Thanks for your reading, give it a share to help out others , in achieving success and happiness.